why did i use that password?

i think it's really lame to complain about the weather...i mean, aren't there so many other things to talk about?

however, i am not going to lie. i am damn sick of being cold. tired of my coat and longing to wear tank tops and skirts. the end.

it feels like it's been a long week because mia has been sick. poor girl. today, instead of my normal friday work day, i am going to work from 1pm-11 pm. thus, wade and i walked to a coffeeshop and we're campd out here for a few hours.

i completely love the feeling of not being at work on a weekday.

Tuesdays sometimes turn out wonderful

and this one did. it just did, ok?

i have realized that my blog can never even begin to come close to the brilliance of elizabeth anne with an e's musings on life.

still, i might keep writing on here.

even when i have a stinky attitude or i want to be by myself reading or with other grownups, not a day goes by without reflections on how thankful i am for my job taking care of three beautiful and amazing little girls. Mia and Greta are so damn cute. really, astonishingly cute. and olivia is probably one of the best 5 year olds out there. it's cool. i juts started reading 'besty and tacy" liv. Betsy and Tacy (and later Tib) books! LOVED them as a kid.

every time i use or type the word "cool" i cringe. what a dumb word.

i have been reading some holocaust literature. i finished "the last seven months of anne frank." so fascinating and sad! i love anne. yesterday i began "an interrupted life: the diaries of etty hillesum." i am amazed reading the intimate thoughts of these young women during such an unreal time in history.

"Here goes, then. This painful and well-nigh insuperable step for me: yielding up so much that has been suppressed to a blank sheet of lined paper. The thoughts in my head are sometimes so clear and so sharp and my feelings so deep, but writing about them comes so hard. The main difficulty, I think, is a sense of shame. So many inhibitions, so much fear of letting go, of allowing things to pour out of me, and yet that is what I must do if I am ever to give my life a reasonable and satisfactory purpose. It is like the final, liberating scream that always sticks bashfully in your throat when you make love."

"The fear of missing out on things makes you miss out on everything."

~Etty Hillesum

Ballet flats and a hoodie

Our apartment smells like coffee (Wade made) and chocolate chip cookies (I made).
I just dropped Wade off at work and I'm a little sad. However, in a little bit I'm going to get really motivated and clean the whole apartment and do laundry. And tonight I babysit.

I just had to go to Target. I am beginning to hate spending money. I think this is positive. Some things about Target:
_Our neighborhood is pretty diverse. It is very obvious on the drive from our place to Target and in the Target store itself. I like it.
_On the drive home I noticed some people putting up a big, pink It's a Girl sign in front of a house and it made me think of all the babies being born right at that very second (amazing to think about). I don't want to have kids anytime soon.

Last night, after I came home from work, Wade and I cooked pasta and ate. Then we went to this little coffee shop called The Bourgeois Pig. We have walked by this place millions of times and actually thought it was a fancy little restaurant. Wade and I had some black coffee and a wonderful, intimate conversation that made me feel drunk on life and so happy to be married to him. After that we saw a movie, The Reader and it was sooooo good. (Don't see it if you are bothered by nudity or sad movies that don't end happily).

Ummmmmmmm....

I am sure the nice weather is being talked about by pretty much everyone in the Midwest right now, but can I just tell you what it was like to feel the sunshine and warm air today after weeks and weeks of biting cold? I can't tell you.

I wore ballet flats and a hoodie today. No boots. No coat. No hat. No mittens (not hating on my mittens or anything, though. I love mittens).

I love the book A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. Possibly my favorite book.

"If there was only one tree like that in the world, you would think it was beautiful," said Kate. "But because three are so many, you just can't see how beautiful it really is. Look at those children." She pointed to a swarm of dirty children playing in the gutter. "You could take any one of them and wash him good and dress him up and sit him in a fine house and you would think he was beautiful."

I hate the superbowl

We are going to church today (surprise!) We will see how awkward it is, since we haven't gone in several weeks...

Then we are going to go to coffee and read. I feel like I don't know what I want to read next. Need to go to the library...